Unity Candle Ceremony Script

Unity Candle Ceremony Tips

The unity candle symbolizes the very essence of the wedding ceremony. Two taper candles, representing the couple as individuals, are used to light a single center candle as a visible symbol of their commitment to each other. There are many variations on the ceremony and the individual details are completely up to you. Here are some ideas to help you as you plan your ceremony.

Preparing for Your Ceremony

Before the ceremony begins, place the unity candle on a small table near the altar. If you have an on-site coordinator who may have specific instructions, be sure to check in advance. To prepare for the ceremony, it is a good idea to light the wicks for a moment (this will make them light much more easily during the ceremony).

There are several popular options for lighting your taper candles. You can have your parents come forward to light the side tapers as a symbol of your two families coming together as one. At this point, some couples choose to present their mothers with a rose. If you wish, the minister or best man and the maid of honor can light the tapers. Or, you may light the tapers yourselves from a candle on the altar.

To Extinguish or Not to Extinguish

When it comes to your unity candle ceremony, that is often the question! While some folks feel that you should extinguish the candles to symbolize your commitment to one another, others argue that to emphasize your individuality within your union, you must leave the tapers lit. Whether or not you extinguish the taper candles is a personal decision and, like many aspects of your wedding planning, is entirely up to you.

If you choose to extinguish your tapers, you might read the following:

As [Name] and [Name] together light the center candle, they will extinguish their own candles, thus letting the center candle symbolize the union of their lives. As this one light cannot be divided, neither will their lives be divided.

If you’d prefer to leave your tapers lit, try this one…

[Name] and [Name] come into their marriage relationship as individuals and they do not lose their identity, rather they use their individuality to create and strengthen the relationship of marriage. Therefore, the three candles remain lighted, one for each of them and one for their marriage, as symbols of their commitment to each other and to a lasting and loving marriage.

Unity Candle Ceremony Module

(Officiant lights the separate candle sticks representing the spouses.)

There are many traditions and rituals commonly included in marriage ceremonies. One of the most beautiful and expressive is the “Unity Candle.” Two fires, separate and individual, uniting their flames to burn as one.

Imagine how you might describe fire to someone who had never experienced it before. It is difficult to say what it is, because it is both substance and energy at the same time. The best you might do is to say that there is always plain evidence of it when it exists, and that you can feel its warmth.

Love similarly would be hard to describe to someone who had never experienced it before, except to say there is always visible evidence of it when it exists…and you can feel its warmth.

[Name] and [Name], as a symbol of the union of your separate selves, would you now light the Unity Candle…

(With their candlesticks, spouses light the larger Unity Candle together.)

Sample wedding scripts are based, in whole or in part, on a sample ceremonies from the Humanist Society and are used with permission.

17. [Name], I used to be afraid of falling in love, of giving my heart away.How could I trust a wo/man to love me, to give to me all that I wanted to give to him/her? When I met you, I realized how much we could share together.Today I join my life with yours.Our miracle, today, lies in the path we have chosen together. I enter this marriage with you knowing that the true magic of love is not to avoid changes, but to navigate them successfully. Let us commit to the miracle of making each day work together. Respecting each other, we commit to live our lives together for all days to come. I ask you to share this world with me, for good and for ill. Be my partner and I will be yours.

8. [Name], In you I have found a friend, a lover, A companion on life’s path. You have become the single most important person in my life. With you I have experienced more happiness, more love and more freedom than I’ve ever known. To you I give my strength and my weakness My beliefs, courage and my fears To you I give my past and my future, My hopes and my dreams.[Name], I promise to accept you without conditions, To love and cherish you, not only for this hour, but for all that may follow. I love you.As I stand before you now, I pledge that these are my solemn intentions.

2. I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my [spouse], to love you, to cherish you, to help you and honor you, to give you comfort and understanding in whatever the future may bring, in confidence that together we are responsible for our destiny.

3. Today, I join my life to yours. From this day on, I will be your partner and companion, for you are my dearest love and my best friend. I look forward to the joy we will find in each other’s separate successes, as well as our shared ones, and welcome the challenge of whatever obstacles we encounter, for I know that whatever we face, we face it together. Because your happiness is vital to me, I will help you to grow as an individual. I will also strive to be more fully myself because you deserve no less than the best of me. I pledge that I will listen to you when you speak encourage you in times of doubt, comfort you in times of sorrow, and be a refuge of strength for you in times of uncertainty. I will be faithful to you all of my days, will always be honest with you, and will cherish and adore you every moment of my life. This is my solemn vow.

4. I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be no other than yourself loving what I know of you trusting what I do not yet know with respect for your integrity and faith in your love for me through all our years and in all that life may bring us.

5. I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my [spouse], to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part. With my whole heart and with my earnest and complete devotion I give you my love.

6. I, [Name], do take you, [Name], To be the [spouse] of my days The friend of my life We shall bear together Whatever trouble and sorrow Life may lay upon us. And we shall share together All the good and joyful things Life may bring us With these words, I marry you And bind my life to yours.

7. I, [Name], promise before family and friends, to commit my love to you, [Name], I promise to speak truthfully and lovingly to you, to respect your individuality and encourage your fulfillment, to compassionately support you through good times and bad, and to do all that I can to nurture and strengthen the love between us, through all of life’s changes.

9. I, [Name], take you, [Name], exactly as you are, to be my [spouse] and my best friend. I love what I know of you. I trust what I do not yet know. I respect you and have faith in your love for me through all our years and in all that life may bring us. I offer you this ring as an emblem of my love.

16. From this day forward, I pledge to live each day with your happiness as my guiding thought.I will listen to your words, your actions, and your thoughts as though they were my own because they are as much a part of me as they are you.I pledge my unwavering trust and devotion no matter what the circumstance. I will support and encourage your dreams, because your dreams are my dreams.I will open my heart, mind and soul to you, so that I may be ever worthy of the selfless love you give. From this day forward, my life is yours.

10. Today, [Name], I accept you for who you are: the wo/man I love. For the honor of your hand in marriage, I vow to be your partner in life, to make you smile when you are sad, to lift you when you are down, to rejoice and share in both your trials and successes. Your path will be my path and I promise to walk not behind or in front, but next to you, together, to face whatever is before us. I vow to remain the man that you love. This ring is a promise that I will love you in all times, all places, in all ways, forever.[Name], I take you to be my lawful wedded [spouse] on this day and everyday hereafter. I will stand by your side at every crossroads to be your shoulder to lean on, your ear to talk to and the mirror for your smile when you are doubled-over laughing. I vow to be a part of the endless love that we see for each other. I will be there for every adversary you face and every joy you experience. This ring is a promise that I will love you in all times, all places, in all ways, forever.

11. [Name], today I take you to be no other than who you are, the wo/man I fell in love with, and now you give me the honor of being able to call you my [spouse].For that honor I promise to always be there to love you and make you smile, or to comfort and protect you.And I promise, that no matter what lies in our path it will be our path, and I will stay the man you fell in love with.I give you this ring as a token that I shall love you, in all times, in all places, and in all ways, forever.

12. [Name], today I choose to make a deeper commitment to you.It is my way of telling you that our experiences together have been so good that I want them to continue for the rest of my life.I loved you before the ceremony and I love you more because of it. You are everything I ever hoped to find in a partner.I want to spend the rest of my life with you.I give you this ring as a token that I shall love you, in all times, in all places, and in all ways, forever.

13. Spouse 1: Today, I join my life to yours. From this day on, I will be your partner and companion, for you are my dearest love and my best friend.Spouse 2: I look forward to the joy we will find in each other’s separate successes, as well as our shared ones, and welcome the challenge of whatever obstacles we encounter, for I know that whatever we face, we face it together.Spouse 1: Because your happiness is vital to me, I will help you to grow as an individual. I will also strive to be more fully myself because you deserve no less than the best of me.Spouse 2: I pledge that I will listen to you when you speak, encourage you in times of doubt, comfort you in times of sorrow, and be a refuge of strength for you in times of uncertainty.Spouse 1: I will be faithful to you all of my days, will always be honest with you, and will cherish and adore you every moment of my life.Both: This is my solemn vow.

14. Before our family and friends, without reservation of any kind I say to you, [Name], I love you. I need you. I promise to unfailingly share and support your hopes and dreams and goals. I will be there for you always; when you falter I will catch you; when you are sad I will comfort you; when you laugh I will share your joy. I will grow old with you by my side. You are the joy in my life and the love in my heart. I commit myself to you today and for always. I promise to be faithful and true to you for the rest of my life.

15. Today is a culmination and a beginning. It is the ceremonial confirmation of what my heart already knows: That you are my one true love, my best friend, and the person I was meant to share my life with. Together we have only begun to experience what love truly means. Together we have only begun to live up to the ideal that is a life filled with love. In you I find my smile, my laugh, and my contentment. In you I find a caring heart and compassionate mind. In you I find trust and togetherness. In you I find a daily reminder of all that makes me feel alive. With you by my side, my life unfolds before me in a panorama of happy days and contented nights.

1. I, [Name], promise you, [Name], that I will be your [spouse] from this day forward, to be faithful and honest in every way, to honor the faith and trust you place in me, to love and respect you in your successes and in your failures, to make you laugh and to be there when you cry, to care for you in sickness and in health, to softly kiss you when you are hurting, and to be your companion and your friend, on this journey that we make together.